Thursday, July 23, 2015

爱你浪费时间
恨你浪费眼泪
相信你的誓言 还不如去相信这个世界上有鬼

没有真心的人 只是爱情的残废

Thursday, July 16, 2015



Happy Birthday.




Tuesday, July 14, 2015



Not making any sense, I meet other people
Not making any sense, I try to love another person
When my love is only you
I hate myself for laughing with someone that isn't you

I stop by that place that you liked
I pick out some clothes that you would like
And I celebrate a birthday of someone that's not you
Even I think I am pretty ridiculous

Wednesday, July 08, 2015

I have been thinking for the past few days and I actually felt disappointed more than upset. All this while, I have been trying too hard to keep you as a friend. I put in effort to randomly drop you messages cause I know that if I don't do so, we may end up not contacting each other at all. Perhaps it was too selfish of me to want to still remain as friends that I failed to see if you wanted to do the same.

You did nothing wrong. Honestly, you never did anything wrong. But I can't help getting mad at you as though you were at fault. I am not sure what's the best for me, for us. Maybe it's better for you to tell me? Or maybe I rather you don't say or do anything at all.

Sometimes I wished we didn't had anything. At least we could still be friends now. Genuine friends that will randomly text to check on each other once in awhile. Genuine friends that will share troubles and still be part of each other's lives. But then the truth is, I am no longer in your life. There isn't a need to update me on your ups and downs anymore. And what made me felt really stupid is I still kept you in my life. I still have the thought of updating you on what I felt were major life decisions to me. To be honest, when I shared stuff with you, I really treated you as a friend. A friend whom I can confide in and seek comfort from. But when it's one sided, it's never gonna last.

If we didn't start anything, at least we could still be like how we used to be. At least I wouldn't be left behind. At least I wouldn't be feeling what I am feeling right now :( 

Monday, July 06, 2015

Supposed to go yoga today but ended up coming home with 20 pieces of nuggets. Was really upset that Macdonalds no longer has the spicy nuggets and banana pie :(

Anyway felt really guilty afterwards and spent an hour on the tracks. Sighs woes of being a woman. 


Came across this article on 4 things that you should not do after a breakup - http://www.bustle.com/articles/78660-4-things-not-to-do-after-a-breakup-what-i-learned-from-my-first-breakup

I think I have been doing all four for like the past 1.9 years. 

I tried everything they tell you to do. I surrounded myself with friends, exercised like a fiend, wasted a lot of money on new clothes and manicures and blowouts, kept myself busy. But nothing worked. I couldn’t seem to move on.

Thursday, July 02, 2015

You made it pretty obvious that I would feel damm silly if I still don't get it. 

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

I knew very well that I shouldn't have expected anything from the start. But when someone makes you a promise, you tend to just expect something. I have to admit that I do have some expectations still from you. Then again, your actions are such a disappointment. I remembered telling you once before that don't ever make a promise if you know there's a possibility that you cannot keep it. I am not sure if you are too confident in yourself or what that you tend to say those words so easily.

Ironic. At the end of the day when you still managed to keep your promise, I will eventually just take it as though nothing happened. And the worst part of everything was, you still made me happy.

Ya! This is super true! Music, photos and other things invoke memories and brings the past flooding back for me on a consistent basis! Hateful things memories in terms of that. But on the up side sometimes they invoke wonderful memories of laughter and awesomeness too !